It is not enough to just assume that the Healthcare Overall is entirely good or evil...

I have friends on both sides of the fence with regards to this matter. For the most part, they are informed people making reasonable decisions. The downer is talking to people that for whatever ideological ax they have to grind find it necessary to spew invectives instead of making salient points or (God forbid) listen to someone else's.

I have come to no official conclusion yet, but I will say that I am generally happier when my tax dollars are spent providing people with healthcare than on unjustified wars. I suppose my chief concern with the new bill is how exactly it will be funded, and whether or not will ultimately bone my new family. Selfish I know, but honest.

I'm off to do more research.

So I'm 30

Dear EM of The Future,

You turned 30 this last weekend and there are some things I think we should consider:

1. Even though it may not seem like it, every step you took over the last 30 years to get where you are now (and where you will be in the future) were entirely your own. It is too easy to call it fate. Though you may have been on a changing sea, you were still Skipper all 30 of those years.
2. At age 30 I pretty much feel the same way I did at age 20...or 10 for that matter. My responsibilities and skills have all changed, but fundamentally, I am the same.
3. 30 years from now your life will be in its third and final stage. Whatever you've been putting off had better take center stage since I have a feeling that the next 30 will pass much faster than the first.
4. Our parents constantly said that family was the only thing you could truly rely on...it was easy to dismiss but it turned out to be 100% true. Future EM, your daughter, and wife, and family will now rely on you the same as you relied on your family.
5. Sometimes, I feel like I have to conform to some arbitrary version of "adulthood" that has been placed on me...I assume its going to get worse so I hope you do your best to ignore it...If you tally it up, I've done much better on my own than with advice.

10 Month Recap

I don't even feel bad about not posting for so long. The last 10 months have been crammed with intense activity. For one, I am now a father of a beautiful baby girl.

Without question it was a total clusterfuck of a pregnancy but it ended well and for that I am eternally thankful. After months of hospital bed rest, my wife gave birth to Amelia Grace (6lbs 60z) and she has since been blowing my mind daily. Even though I know it is totally cliche to say that being a parent changes your life, and is incredibly awesome etc etc, I am still inclined to gush about it. I won't, but just know that I want to...

Another milestone would be the purchase of my new house. We spent just under 9 months in my mother's house (2 of which with an infant) and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. To be fair, any minor quibbles were seriously overshadowed by the aforementioned pregnancy, but still, my mother and wife behaved admirably. Our new house is much bigger than we expected and sits so close to the C&D Canal that I can watch boat traffic from my window. Big win.

Oh yeah, I got a new job too. My new school is brand new and filled with (for the most part) respectful and hard working students. I can't complain at all really.

So if you've been paying attention 1 out of my 2 main goals has been accomplished. Onwards to goal 2 and a boat for Amelia and me to sail!

Sailing a Thistle

Is really fucking hard. Here is an excerpt from a conversation had between myself and the gentleman gracious enough to instruct me on a nice (albeit windy) Wednesday afternoon:

Instructor: A lot people have trouble pointing the boat into the wind when it strengthens...some people just get it and some don't. It looks like you're a natural.

Me: (secretly glowing inside) Alright...Maybe we can try jibing....Prepare to jibe!....Jibe Ho!

Instructor: Uh you're overstea.....SPLASH...gurgle gurgle gurgle...oh shit...gurgle gurgle

Me: gurgle gurgle I'll get the gurgle bucket

The cool thing is that no one was too pissed and we managed to keep the boat from capsizing...Man you just can't have an ego if you're gonna learn anything. These boats just won't let you.

All of my posessions are now in a storage box

It isn't even the larger sized PackRat...Yep, I sold my house and now my wife and I are living with my mother while we search for a new abode. This is not as bad as it sounds. To be honest, I really like the idea of NOT owning a house. If there were any places in Delaware worth renting, I'd give it serious consideration.

I guess it is kind of a bummer when you tell people you're living with your folks until your can find a new house. Our society does not look fondly upon this type of behavior although in many circumstances it makes the most sense. I know many people who probably should move in with 'rents for a while, but instead they work really hard at jobs they hate to afford apartments and houses. Just goes to show you how powerful culture can be...I for one, will suffer the verbal abuse until the time is right and I find a house worth buying...Go ahead call me a loser.

Modern American Parenting Blows

Barring very few exceptions, the majority of young parents I know today are complete assholes. Everything in the universe focuses on the development of their child, as if the human race has not been perpetuating itself for the last age or more. The sad thing is that its not even their fault. I mean, what do you do in a society that tells you that everything your young child does, from pooping to playing sports will affect him for the rest of his life? Every stick of carrot, or drop of soda, is a potential key to worldly success, or a life of...gulp...mediocrity. Honestly, what is a parent to do?

Calm the fuck down is what. I have been a huge fan of Tom Hodgkinson's work for the last few years. His books, How to be Idle, and The Freedom Manifesto argue for a saner world, in which its inhabitants seek more pleasure out of life and spend less time fretting about the future. Recently he has written a series of articles entitled "The Idle Parent" in which he outlines his thoughts on parenting. We really should just calm the fuck down.

Oddly enough, this brings me to the Catholic Church. I am a recovering Catholic and in spite of the fact that I hold the majority of its teachings in disdain, I did get married in a church. Its a long story. Anyway, my wife and I had to take classes in "Catholic marriage" and most of what they taught was predictably total bullshit, HOWEVER, I was struck with one concept that above all made sense to me. Married couples should live for each other, NOT their children. This will lead to a happy marriage and by extension, happier children. The teacher explained it like this:

"Once when I was younger, I complained to my mother that I did not approve of her choice for dinner. She replied, 'I don't cook for YOU, I cook for your FATHER' It was right then that I knew my place in the world, and it was comforting."

So, yeah, calm the fuck down already, your kid will probably be just fine.

I Leave for Italy on Friday

Every year my wife and I take a group of students abroad for spring break. This year, its Italy. I'm not as excited as you might imagine about our trip. Sure, it'll be fun to watch the kids experience a new culture et cetera, but I've found Italy (at least the parts most frequently visited by Americans) to be entirely too touristy. I mean, if it were any more geared towards large tour groups, there would be actors dressed in large plush costumes selling candy.

Don't get me wrong, I am not one of those snobby backpacker types that needs everything to be as "authentic" as possible. I really don't like the idea of getting malaria, or being uncomfortable to prove just how worldly I am. I just find the major Italian cities to be a bit too much. In Madrid for example, one could find a really nice little spot to have a coffee and not feel like a total outsider looking in. A lot depends on our tour guide...will she shuffle us from site to site or will be permitted time to roam free? I swear that pun was NOT intended....Now I kinda wish it was...shit.